The unease I have been feeling for the last couple of days has exploded my musing. It is small wonder that my concentration as been for shit, my work a mess and all over the psyche.
This morning my advanced mourning system overloaded and short circuited me for a bit. After that was done I knew that my only recourse is to straighten up, paste on a smile and move forward. But tonight, after its unveiling, I am allowing myself to feel indifferent, I need the mask. I will work on happy in a moment.
But, a baby was born in my world this afternoon and the wonder it brought, the extensive and graphic photos, the beautiful and exhausted family... I can't wait to see him first thing in the morning. Seven pounds, nine oz. While he has a given name, there seems to be some contention on what he will actually be called.
I think that when I see his face, I will know.
I hope he will be happy.
True.
True.
Tuesday, May 11: Sharpie on Paper, 9"x12"
Sigh...
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