Sunday, October 31, 2010

Day Three Hundred Four: The Tribe

In the midst of Halloween, I am costumeless... no mask to cover my face, no place to hide. 

Sunday, October 31: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Day Three Hundred Three: Oh Shit

yeah, I need a new idea.

Saturday, October 30: Sharpie on paper

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Day Three Hundred Two: So, Synchronicity...

I am seeing it all around me. Stuff that tells me stuff.

I am thinking about something and the next thing I see has an answer, if I look. Strange stuff, like the next person you talk to has the same name as someone you where worried about and has something to say that answers your dilemma as you wonder about the perfection of the timing.

I see it and it makes me laugh. Ah Ha, you caught me. I get it, so easy. Signposts in neon when I begin to look for them. Come this way, say this thing, love this person, ride this direction. Hang on honey, the ride is going to be a thriller.

Friday, October 29: sharpie and tempera on paper.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Day Three Hundred One: Voices in the Mayhem

I had the strangest coincidence today. I was going to send a message to a friend. He had failed to send me birthday wishes and I was going to joke with him about it. However, even as I contemplated it, I was leaning toward a message that might seem to me to be a bit snotty. And just as I was in that reverie, at work, a call came in that requested that we place them on the Do Not Call list. To do that for them, I inquired their name. I had to ponder the odds when it happened to be the same name as my friend... do not call. 

Small sign for sure, but I heeded it. No need to add a negative edge to any relationship. Thank you universe. 

Thursday, October 28: Sharpie and Tempera on Paper, 11x15

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Day Three Hundred: Holy Crap... 300

I am resilient and I persevere. At least with things that interest me. I am not so good at others. Actually, I might be downright apathetic to things that I am not focused on, interested in, or creating with. For now, art, biking, writing and talking seem to hold my interest. Talk to me, I love it when you call and tell me everything. 

For now, tangled webs seem to need to be spun, and undone. 

Wednesday, October 27: Sharpie on paper 9x12

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Nine: Its My Birthday

And I am alone. by choice. Comtemplation needs solitude.

Tuesday, October 26: Sharpie on Paper, 9x12

Monday, October 25, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Eight: Oh Crap

Today is one of those days that I will not miss when I am no longer under my own tyrannical rules about posting something daily. One of those days where I have to question my dedication, my conception of art. What the fuck is this piece anyway. 
On the other hand, I never know when something I have thought nothing recurs in another form, grander, its fleeting birth under the guise of the mundane.
So I will appreciate the action if not the form. I will quiet my mind.

Monday: October 25: Sharpie on paper. 9x12

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Seven: I got to babysit

Babysitting might not sound like something so grand except that no one has ever asked me to babysit since I was a kid and had two younger brothers under my wing at all times. 
I was the adult today with my two great nephews: Dante 11 and Brandon 6 months. It was a good couple hours and we had fun. Thank goodness Dante is so good at this brother baby thing. He changed a diaper, made a bottle and arranged pillows for his little brother. I was just there watching and on stand by in case a fire spontaneously flared... or something. 
I enjoyed it. I really did.
When little kids smile at me, it makes me feel sort of normal.

Sunday, October 24: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Six: Transformers? Really? NO!

My knowledge of pop culture failed me today. Or perhaps it was damn Google provides answers so fast that my  own better story was dashed when the truth of something provocative. 
On the back of the car in front of me: "To  Punish and Enslave"
Who puts that on their car? Why? Perhaps it is sexual... woooo.

No. Google tells me it is from the Transformers movie. Damn. My imagination was just beginning fun dance with the possibilities. And Google blew it. Damn.

For today, my focus reshaped my vision:

Saturday, October 23: Sharpie, tempera paint on canvas panel, 16x20

Day Two Hundred Ninety Five: Be Prepared

Excitement can be found everywhere, my mundane is not helping me. I need to get out there where I can be struck by something new and weird. For instance, today, oddly, I found comfort and insight from Dominos.

Friday, October 22: photo in the mist

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Four: Hearts are Thumping

Every day is an opportunity to learn forbearance. And happiness is the way. I pull out my happy thoughts whenever patience, forbearance or tolerance seems to be needed. Then I go to myself to find what in me is causing the need. What judgement am I holding that is causing the stress. I do not necessarily need to change the situation, merely my perception. 
Yes, every day brings an opportunity to learn.

Thursday, October 21: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Three: Bark and Howl

Listen to your words. I tell myself that all the time. What are you saying versus what you really want and really mean. Spiteful utterances only bring more spite. So I tell myself all the time. Getting the noise out of my mouth is helping me to get the noise out of my head.

Just like moms always say: If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all. 

So, I just make something with my hands, use my happy imagination and give my ego a rest. Leggo my ego!

Wednesday, October 20: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety Two: Time For Change

Not that the present is not perfection in itself, it is what it is. But change happens and it is welcome.

Tuesday, October 19: Sharpie on Paper, 9x12

Monday, October 18, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety One: Thoughts Creating Now.

Things are bubbling up. I have a feeling that the white cars are leading me to somewhere I want to be. I am paying attention and doing what I can.
I write, I ride, I roll, I rock.

Monday, October 18: Sharpie on Paper

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Day Two Hundred Ninety: Contrast

I am nearly asleep. I think I will continue down that path. Sleep. Sleep.

Sunday, October 17: Sharpie on paper, 11x15

Day Two Hundred Eighty Nine: The Piper

I expected more. 

I enjoyed the day, but I expected more people. But those in attendance represent such a diverse group. All eager for approval, laughs, accolades. But all looking for connection. My little foursome, my driving companions, all single, all bright, but all like me searching. Very sweet, very genuine, a little bit kooky and truthfully, I would know none of them where it not for TMI. 

On an even brighter side, it was a gorgeous day. I got to walk in a historic neighborhood. The mighty Columbia river was as mighty as ever. I could not have asked for better walk from where I left from. From the conference site to the bike/hike trail was a few blocks. I did not know it was there, I was outside and was drawn that direction. I just walked and there was the river, the path and some sunshine.  I missed my bike.

And finally I am home. Sigh. And the piper nears.

Saturday, October 16: Sharpie on Paper, 9x12

Friday, October 15, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Eight: White Cars

Mind bending perfection. And a sense of humor. That is what I saw today. White cars.

Thank you.
Friday, October 15: sharpie on paper, 9x12

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Seven: I Believe

Some days out in the world, I can feel it more than others. By it, I mean IT. The connection thing. The oneness, the love connection, the within that keeps you from going without. I know it is always there, but some times I feel more tuned in. My channel is coming in clear. Today was a particularly nice day.

I mean Nice. And from there, all things flow. Welcome to my dream.

Thursday, October 14: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Six: The Universe has a sense of humor.

This morning I had a little coffee and gossip session with my niece, the usual. I was telling her about the cute, tall boy I had met at the party. How particularly striking he was and his effect on the women in the room. The glancing encounter we had. As I was getting rather animated with my description of my favored archetype, something odd happened. The music player on my phone began to play a song.

Now, I do not know how it happened to come on, it was sitting on the coffee table. And I don't know how it made its selection of music to play because I had not played that particular artist for perhaps a year and not at all on my new phone. But there in the midst of my ephemeral longing for tall, strong and sexy, the deep, throaty voice sings: "I'm Your Man". That is one of the sexiest songs I know (thank you Leonard Cohen) and kind of makes me weak in the knees.

I paused it, though I was curious still. I had to go. I finished up the coffee, said good bye and headed out to go biking where I turned it back on. Turns out there was a really strange threesome of random tracks lined up to speak to me. 

The incredible voice of Leonard reminding me that some tall, strong and sexy could be really, really fine. 

I'm Your Man! Leonard Cohen

Next in my awakening today, came a song by my good friend Matthew Winters: "Vast and Charming". It is a song I love and ask often if he will play it for me and he seldom does, claiming that it is too old and he barely remembers. It begins with "I go out to find my myself, I wander through the vast and charming world, meandering a life without a purpose..." and ending with a line in it that screamed to me again: "I went out to find myself and I was in your vast and charming eyes". Oh shit! I heard dancing in my thoughts as randoms on my phone played on.

Then, I nearly fell over when the third and what turned out to be final selection played for me. (Mind, I have no idea how random works on the droid music player) It was a spoken piece by Dr Wayne Dyer: "The Seventy Second Verse of the Tao Te Ching". That verse advises me to remain in awe, and total acceptance, preferring what is within to what is without. It tells me to avoid self limits, accept my body as a perfect creation and allow my life to unfold in accordance with its own nature. 

Heavy stuff. Fun and sexy is my nature and I am a perfect creation... Enjoy? Unfold? I'm your man!

Sure, coincidence, my own interpretation, random... I don't really care, it seemed divine to me. I am rolling with it. If the universe wants to bowl me over, I am listening. Then silence returned. I rode and rode, humming a happy tune.

So, I am in awe:

Wednesday, October 13: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

P.S. I know he will appear in his own good time. I prepare now though. Who knows from what direction we might intersect. I am thankful I was reminded to be open. It could happen at any Now. So much else is happening, why not.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Five: I am Strong! I am Invincible.

This drawing looks like my pillow is getting ready to get laid. 
My real pillow is just smashed in a ball under my head. And I am ready to sleep. Lots of things to manifest tomorrow. 

Tuesday, October 12: sharpie on paper, 9x12

Monday, October 11, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Four: Columbus is Dead.

I am astounded by the gorgeous weather today. If I had not had to go see the Verizon store this morning, I would have easily gone another ten beyond the fourteen I managed to squeeze out. But I have learned to rely heavily on my device and it shorted out yesterday. Seems as though while I love riding in the rain, the phone is not so happy with that situation. It needs a raincoat. I just need a fire when I am done. Or a hot shower. I do like a hot body. 

So, a hard ride, a blazing fire, hot pulsing water... whatever it takes. The phone will just have to toughen up.

Monday, October 11: Sharpie on paper 9x12

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty Three: Pardon me while I stalk you

So, I met the hottest guy last night. By that I mean, when he appeared in the room all the single girls turned to ask "who is that?", while thinking "Mine!". Tall, 6'5" it turns out is my favorite height. I got all confused for a bit as I felt myself become feral, in heat, purring while on the hunt. I wasn't alone and it was hard to cut him from the herd to determine whether in fact there was more to him than wow, you are a big one.
Then I had the thought that this must happen to him everywhere he goes. Whether or not he was arrogant about it, I could not tell either, I suspect it was just what it was for him. I wondered briefly if he could smell it in the air, the ready and moist women. But perhaps he didn't notice, that smell is everywhere he goes.
So, I stepped out. Perhaps he is even shy. After all, he never has to pursue, perhaps being demure serves him better. Perhaps being a chick magnet is a burden if you are not out to just get laid as often as possible. Which I would. 

Perhaps I should just stick to riding my bike and making art.

Sunday, October 10: Sharpie on paper, 11x15

Day Two Hundred Eighty Two: I give you one shot

Then I get confused and run away. I don't mean to be a mean girl, I just don't have time. But at least I got to see the best of Corbin's Ditch.

Saturday, October 9: photo of strange things.

Friday, October 8, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty One: Damn Flies

I know that winter approaches when all the flies move inside. Inside the car, the bedroom, the kitchen. My natural inclination to let them be and to scoot them outside is tested when they hover about my head and hands. And they are so slow. So easy to swat as they move towards death. I can see a carcass on the floor and it gives me pause for small regret. 

And on the bike path they swarm, in my eyes and mouth and ears. Not everywhere, but in clouds just far enough apart that I forget and smile and sing to myself again. And there when my mouth is open, they appear.  Fresh protein is okay, but they taste like bugs and I imagine them fresh off the poop on the side of the path.

Damn flies.
Friday, October 8: Sharpie on paper, 11x15

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Day Two Hundred Eighty: I Am Enthusiastic

And yet, sleep calls, chocolate sustains, legs ache. More of that please.

Thursday, October 7: Sharpie on paper

P.S. I gave the following as a talk at Toastmasters this morning:

**Laugh out loud for a sustained time**

Now my blood pressure lower, my stress is reduced, my abs got a work out and I am better looking.

Not only is laughter and smiling an expression of joy and playfulness, but it has a long list of health benefits, a rich spiritual history and provides a wealth of social benefits.

Victor Hugo says that “laughter is the sun that drives the winter from the human face”. And a sunny face is much more attractive!  Increasingly hospitals are using laughter formally in healing therapy. In addition to the lower blood pressure, regular hearty laughter reduces stress hormones and boosts the immune system. A good guffaw triggers the release of endorphins that are natural painkillers and produce a general sense of well-being. Aids and cancer patients have attested to its use - it is hard to be depressed when you are laughing and many have reported that ten minutes of laughter can alleviate pain for up to two hours.

It also enhances oxygen intake, stimulates the heart and lungs and improves sleep. Finally, it has been shown to improve mental function with increased alertness, better memory and enhanced creativity. I heard a story of patients diagnosed with acute depression. Some even claimed that they were depressed in their sleep. For one month they were placed in front of a mirror for 30 minutes a day and instructed to smile and laugh. At the end of that time, nearly all of them were off their medication and cured. Now that is power.

On the spirituality front, the laughing exercise I did is a reproduction of a famous speech by a Zen monk. He ended it with “This is true spirituality”. Mother Theresa said that peace begins with a smile. Buddhists have said that laughter can lead to a state of elevation, leading to enlightenment. If you Google it, you can find numerous instructions on laughter meditation. Laughter is one of the easiest ways to free you from the mind's constant thought process and find inner peace. It will make you more alive, more healthy, more creative, and more silent. Simply relax into the enjoyment. You will discover in yourself a tremendous natural talent for rejoicing in life. You may even laugh your way to enlightenment. Yes, it's that good.

In Genesis it says “God has given me laughter and everyone who hears about it will laugh with me.” In Proverbs: “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”  Laughter is a gift from god.  If I can laugh my way to awareness, I will giggle my way to heaven.

But while I am here, I love the social benefits. Laughing and smiling speaks straight to the heart, bypassing the intellect and ego.  Joseph Addison said: “What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity.”  Laughter increases your face value. I know I am better looking when I smile! Laughter is sexy even as laughter burns more calories than sex. Laughter is a universal language. When you smile you draw people to you and laughter and playfulness can strengthen your relationships. Time and again I have had people tell me what a great laugh I have. When I worked in NYC there was a man across the aisle from me that transferred to another department after a year. One day I saw him and he remarked that people asked him what happened to the laughing lady they used to hear in the background on his phone. I used to get embarrassed but now, I laugh more. Because of that some of my friends come and ask me to laugh so they can. Perhaps it is my gift.

Laughter can snap us out of melancholy and put things back into perspective. I know that just an upturn of my lips boosts my spirits instantly. Yes, I can fake it, but only for a minute, then it takes over, and viola, I am smiling, laughing and happier.

The study of laughter and its effects on the human body is called gelotology. I don’t know about all that.  I just love the fact that it’s free and there are no know side effects even if it is addicting. I give a smile or a laugh whenever I can, even if it’s just to me. And when I get a smile or giggle out of my infant nephew, I know that the universe likes me.  So, I will smirk, smile, grin, snicker, titter, chortle, cackle, giggle, snort, guffaw, howl or roar my way to health, good looks and enlightenment.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Nine: In a Fog

When I think about things the words just flow in my head. When I am talking to friends, words just flow out of my mouth like crazy. When I sit down to write, there is nothing. Except of course, occasionally here, because I am just babbling to myself not expecting to say anything either. 

I have great ideas for speechifying when I am nowhere near giving one. But when I sit down to write one, I become dead in the head. 

From here on, I vow to write only to myself. Perhaps I will listen.

Wednesday, October 6: Photo I took in the wee hours.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Eight: Smile, Laugh Out Loud

Some days it is so easy to smirk, smile, grin, giggle, guffaw or laugh. I am working on making all days that easy. Sometimes it starts with a grimace and works its way upward to a chortle, to twitter,  to snicker, to snort to chuckle to giggle to laughter to a howl. No matter where it starts, a laugh is good for me. And you come to think of it.

Tuesday, October 5: sharpie on paper, 9x12

Monday, October 4, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Seven: Velvet and Miracles

I had a Starbucks this morning. Not impressive as far as flavor goes. But then I never like their coffee except for my addiction to the frappuccino that I can get at any grocery store. I did have quite the caffeine hit though. And it fired me through a bike ride and a couple hours of work. YeeHaw!

Then the bonk happened and I was ready to snooze. Some grapes provided enough sugar to stave off a nap. 

But not enough to inspire me. I continue to imitate myself. 

Monday, October 4: sharpie on paper, 9x12

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Six: Major turning point

I love thrift shops. I love Nordstroms too, don't get me wrong, but I love the thrill of a really good find. I have to be in the mood for the hunt, in either place. But today was a rainy day, and I had a feeling that I would find something good. And I did. I wish you could see my red dress. I can totally ride in it. The suit, not so much, but the coat is a dream for my style.

And then I rode. Hills. I can barely move. Sigh. Happy thighs now were crying earlier. I need more hills. Yes, hills will move me to the next level. Happy when cruising down after the climb and happy when eating ice cream later.

Ahhh... good deals, good legs, good treats.

Sunday, October 3: Sharpie on paper, 9x12

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Five: Off The Top Of My Head

I love to spread my day out into different things, new things specifically. However, old memories thrown it are nice too. I got to drive today, two hours each way to Pullman via Moscow. In Moscow I got my bike out and cruised up through campus to the Arts & Letters Building. Vague memories of college and insecurity and sweaty nights with fraternity boys danced through the back of my brain. Once in Pullman, I had a small competition to extemporaneously speak for two minutes on a question presented at that moment. I won with the question: "If you could change the ages or sex or your siblings or be an only child, what would you choose and why." That was a fun time. Then I got to take my bike out in the October sun, blazing like summer was still in its bikini and aching to beat some rays into my black biking dress.  The bike path between the two towns is seven miles of smooth asphalt and charming waysides. After that I got to visit with some girls that think differently than I, have lived on different hopes than I and will continue to manifest different dreams than I.  And we enjoyed each others company until I got to drive two hours home to make this:

Saturday, October 2: Sharpie on paper, 11x15

Friday, October 1, 2010

Day Two Hundred Seventy Four: Its Hip To Be Square

Yeah, apologies to Huey but I am going to bed early tonight so that I can get up early on a Saturday. 
Not only is there bike riding to be done, but speech-ifying as well. Thats right, another competition. Out of town this time. and better this time as I am only in the impromptu section. Get up and get the question and think up a two minute talk, on the spot. 
Just like the Miss America pageant. Except without the gowns and tiaras. 
Not that if I had a tiara, I wouldn't wear it... 

Because I totally would rock a tiara... I am a princess. A bike and art princess. Wait, let me upgrade to Queen. No wait.. Empress. Empress of Bike and Art... Yeah, I do like the sound of that. 

Off with their heads!

Friday, October 1: Sharpie on Paper, 9x12